Bill-er the Kill-er Redux

I have been around the True Blood fandom for a while now and I have to say that (1) it has the craziest fan base I have ever seen and (2) I have seen and heard a lot from fans that have sent me on many a tirade. In honor of that, I thought I would touch on a topic that has set me on a path of being put in a certain class of fans, namely the Rabids or Crabids depending on where you read on the World Wide Web. Now, I know that what I am about to discuss is once again going to label me a hater and being raked over the coals in some small corner of the internet. All I can say to this is what else is new and hey it’s just my fangpinion. I am also quite okay with that. I am a proud Rabid. All seriousness aside now, let’s get to the fun of it.

Once upon a time in a web world not far away was the True Blood Facebook discussion board and boy was it fun. There once was a thread entitled and I shit you not “Bill-er the Kill-er’ that was supposed to be a mocking thread to make fun of us Rabids and our opinions. See, we Rabids were convinced that Bill set up the whole Rat-tray beating so he could get closer to Sookie and get his blood in her. We were raked over the coals for that thought and many others so hence the above mentioned thread was born. This thread listed jokes that mentioned a number of things that Bill was responsible for, all jokes of course because we were being mocked for our beliefs. I found it highly entertaining and I actually miss reading it. A lot of the posts were out there but so damn funny because they made him responsible for everything going on in Bon Temps and elsewhere. Hell, they did a better job than we did. LOL!

So my topic today is what else can we blame on Bill-er the Kill-er? My favorite one is that Bill killed Sookie’s parents and this is where I am going to once again be labeled as a hater. I really want this to happen on True Blood because it would make for a great story. Every show I watch there is always a supposed good guy and the supposed bad guy. Sure the good guy goes bad for a while and the bad boy goes good but then the roles get reversed again and it is so overdone. My proposal is that Bill has been the bad guy all along (we have seen signs of it) and Eric is the good guy (we have seen this too). It would turn out that everyone was fooled by Mr.Compton and it would make a fitting controversy and water cooler chat at work for years to come. I can see it now, “Do you remember when it turned out that Bill was the cause of it all? Wow, I did not see that coming at all. I can’t believe what the writers pulled off there, they really did shock me this time”. EPIC!

So do you want to play along? This post is meant to be fun and to entertain all of us myself so please let’s not get negative and make comments that are along the line of “Ball will never have the writers do that, he loves Bill to much” or “Bill will never be made to be the bad guy” just have fun with it. How would you like Bill to go down? Can you all come up with a 100 ways to kill Bill?

Remember, have fun with it and make it good for I really did miss the thread, even thought it was chock full of sarcasm! LOL

*special thanks to Tammydevil666 (another regular poster here) for the first graphic in this post* ;)

About Nymerias

I am an avid book reader and when I am not writing for these two (now three) blogs that is what I am doing. I love Boardwalk Empire, Game of Thrones, Big Bang Theory, Criminal Minds, Blue Bloods, Outlander and many other shows. I am also a major hockey fan, especially my Detroit Red Wings! I also enjoy classic books and legal thrillers.

52 comments on “Bill-er the Kill-er Redux

  1. 1. Bill glamoured Rene into killing Gran.
    2. Pam was right. Bill set up Eric and deliberately sent him to the witches knowing that his memory could be wiped away.
    3. Bill collaborated with Claudine to make sure that Sookie willingly went to Fairy.
    4. During the TB witch war, Bill instructed his snipers to shoot Sookie in the cemetery so that he could give her more of his blood.

    I’m sure I can think of more… I’ve read plenty of fanfic where Bill is the villain…

    Btw- I really do believe he set the whole Rattray thing up for the sole purpose of getting his blood in her.

    • The last part we know is true, but the rest is probably something they would never do on the show. If they do, it will likely just get ignored like everything else.

  2. OMG>…………….i was thinking the same damn thing. That Bill killed sookie’s parents seriously!!!!!!!!!! um…..go back to the band-aid remember i think it was season 2 or 3 where sookie is looking through bill’s things or someone is and I SWEAR THEY FIND A BAND-AID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the same shit that shows in sookie’s mind!!!!!!!!!!


    • I was curious about this Band-Aid and watched the scene again it was when Franklin Mott broke into his house in season 3 the episode name was “Beautifully Broken”. Us Viking lovers will know it as the episode Eric asked Sookie to invite him in and there was a werewolf inside…Anyhow.. there was no Band-Aid in the file. If there is another episode someone goes through his stuff please let me know so I can check it out. Because trust me I would love to pin Sookie’s parents death on Bill. =-)

  3. okay i will now come up with 100 ways to kill bill……..sorry got super hyper after reading before that part of the blog lol

  4. Well i think the one women that he loves should be the one to have him walk in the sun and fry ,but die this time. To waitingviking82 you are right about that,it is all so the stuff that king had lol. I forgot about all that now i must watch all of them again……..

  5. *claps* ooo l’m lovin’ this post! I think AB has been feeding the “I love Bill” PR machine so that when we see that he IS behind so may eveeeel things it will be a shocker. Bill has been kissing ass for so long and look how high he has climbed in such a short amount of time in vampire terms. Hmmm and Queen SA and Nan, his fave asses to kiss, all ended up dead. And now that I mention it, he puckered up to Roman’s nice ass too and now he’s goo. I know that he has had his sights on running the Authority. Just my opinion.

    • Agreed!! I think what you said is true too. Bill is a major asskisser! Lol

    • Is Roman really goo? Do we know that yet? Seriously, I’m wondering cuz there is always that little something…..like maybe kiss ass bill jumps in & pulls the stake before he’s total goo? plus…I haven’t been online lately to catch any spoilers..

  6. OOOOHHH! FUN! Target rich environment here!
    1. Season 1 Kill Bill- At Fangtasia, after Eric meets Sookie, wants her and sees who she’s with he stakes Longshadow then turns the stake on Bill saying “Hey fucktard….that was MY job,!”, turns to Sookie and says “Come here Lover!”
    2. Season 2 Kill Bill- In Dallas Lorena arrives and corners Bill in his hotel room. She throws him on the ground and drives the point of her wooden stiletto’s into his heart saying “What did I ever see in you?”Meanwhile Eric and Sookie are in another room playing hide the gracious plenty!
    3. Season 3 Kill Bill- During dinner at a french restaurant Bill proposes to Sookie and she doesn’t answer right away. Sookie runs to the restroom to collect herself then returns to the table, pulls a stake out of her purse and drives it through his heart saying “what makes you think I would ever marry you, you lying, cheating, conniving piece of shit”! Sookie runs out of the restaurant laughing hysterically, straight into Eric’s arms.
    4. Season 4 Kill Bill- Queen Sofie Ann shows up at Bill’s house expecting to get the fairy she ordered. Bill confronts her, Nan shows up with the gay stormtroopers and Bill thinks Nan is there to kill QSA and make HIM queen. Nan turns all the guns on Bill, shouts out “You….Queen……I don’t think so….SPLAT! BIG Problem solved! Sookie and Eric are watching it all on videocam from the couch at Fangtasia.
    Season 5 Kill Bill- Eric is busily pretending to speed clean bill’s study while bill is blathering on the phone. Eric grabs the phone, hangs it up and stakes bill with a special attachment on the wet-dry vac called the Queen Splat Tip! Eric returns to Sookie’s house and finishes blessing every room in her house.
    (This is the first time I’ve ever thought of ANY of these…….honest!)

  7. When we first met William Thomas Compton III I liked him.
    I mean what was not to like~the hair,still wet like he’d just came out a shower,
    those sapphire blue eyes that would make you melt,or the manners any mother
    would love, then there’s that voice, like fine aged cognac warmed over a gentle flame.
    Between Season 1 & 2 something happened and he changed like night & day.
    In Season 2 he became hard and cold, and he wasn’t loving towards the woman
    whom he said he loved~Bill was/is very good at hiding his true MO.
    We really don’t know who sent him to Bon Temps~was it Queen Sophie Anne.
    Or was it the Authority who sent him to BonTemps~or Nan Flaganan???

    What we do know is that he’s betrayed Sookie Stackhouse more than once.
    I truly lost all respect for him in Season 3.
    I hope that Sookie ends up with Eric Northman at the end of TrueBlood,
    and in the books!!!!

    I love Stephen Moyer, the actor but can’t stand his character.

  8. I think…because they showed gloves picking up the bandaid in the back of the car, & because I have seen her.in scenes where she is wearing gloves, that the vampire who killed Sookie’s parents was Queen Sophie. Of course, she is now dead…and we know someone has been protecting Sookie ever since that fateful day. I’m not convinced it was the Fae. And I doubt Sophie’s “procurer” would have protected her then (we now know that was Bill’s role in Queen Sophie’s realm). However, having once been a father, perhaps Bill did protect the young Sookie. What I would really like to see, is that Eric has been her protectorate all along and she is the reason he became “sheriff” of. AREA 5. Of course, like the rest.of us here, I am always willing to give the sexy Viking the benefit of the doubt.

  9. Ooh, I love this – great idea Nymerias

    Okay, in Cold Grey Light of Dawn, Bill falls victim to his own legendary cheapness and unwittingly purchases cheap aluminium chains for him and Jess. Marnies spell hits and he pushes Jessica out of the way as he runs out of the Palace yelling, “the Sun, the Sun…….. oh no…..I will nevah see mah mirhacle again”. The camera gives us a closeup of Queen Beels cats butt face as he burns. *sigh of relief heard around the world* Later that night, Sookie and Eric visit Bills grave, Eric pats Bill’s headstone on the way back to Sookie’s house for a spot of Viking Vampire pillaging.

    • LMAO @ Eric pats Bill’s headstone on the way back to Sookie’s house for a spot of Viking Vampire pillaging.

      That is so something the Viking would do…lol

  10. I remember in season 3 when Russell told bill that he dindnt know if bill was such a gentleman(love her) with Sookie, or he was just a “fairy blood saver”, he did’nt drain the whole fairy so he could just enjoy it in sips making the experience last longer!
    I don’t know what is going to trigger his madness maybe Sookie confronts him with Jason’s investigation of the death of her parents, she will try and call Eric so he can take care of him. Bill will try to drain her, cause he becomes “insaner”, even if that word dont exist, but Sookie’s blood is going to make it worse he will be intoxicated and while draining her, Eric will feel her fear and go to her to save her, He will toss our villain aside like a puppet and take care of wounded Sookie, And while bill charges into Eric giving his blood to Sookie to save her ,Sookie sees him coming with a stake and warns our Hero, He turns around in time and Stakes bill instead!! HEA

  11. ”..playing hide the gracious plenty”… *stands up to slow clap it out* epic, I love the way you think, Peecan :D

  12. I like this idea a lot better than what I first thought when I saw the last episode. My reaction was, great, another reason for Sookie to freak out and try to avoid the vamps – more importantly, Eric.

    I know (and am happy) that the show diverges greatly from the books but I keep hoping that Sookie will veer back to Eric like she did several books after the super awesome amnesiac sex fest. If it was Bill this might push her into his arms or it might, in typical wish-washy Sookie style, cause her to try and escape them all over again.

    I’m starting to think that Quinn will not make an appearance (which is fine by me) so it;s hard to gauge where we are in the story, especially with the advent of the authority. The Rhodes conference would have made for great TV and is where the blood bond id formed, which is a major influence in the relationship and story line but it seems like that may not happen.

    Ultimately, I’m down with anything that gives us more irresistible Viking.

    • why are you happy that the show diverges from the books, because of this the show hs become the bill show, later on its seems bill will even get mad because of the dose of lilliths blood he gets and eric needs so save him, its always about beehl beehl beehl. Its frustrating and the writers clearly wnat sookie and bill to end up together, even though they only have a relatively short relationship in teh books.

      • Guys this post is meant to be fun in that we are thinking of ways to kill Bill or what else we can blame on him. You all are veering off from the path. Let’s get back to the topic at hand folks. Just have fun with it and talk about the show in a show post

  13. I think it would be so cool if after Sookie and Jason find out that Bill was the one to kill their parents that Sookie gets so pissed she stakes Billy Boy herself. I would call that a case of justice. She owes herself to get the Jerk out of her life and just go to Eric and be happy.

  14. KILL BILL:
    Season 5- Sookie already knows Bill killed her parents. Russell Edginton gets Eric, Bill and Sookie, he kidnapped them. He wants to know who of them (Eric or Bill) is who Sookie truly loves because he wants to take his revenge for his boyfriend’s death…Russell sais Sookie he’ll kill both unless she chooses the one she loves…she chooses Eric knowing that Russell is going to kill the other who he suposses to be her real love so Russell kills Bill cutting off his head with a sword. Eric and Sookie go together to make love all around..in the woods…in the porch..on the rug…in the shower…

  15. Kill. Bill..caught in the midst of a in a romantic “situation.” with the Reverend Steve Newlin, By “Sister Sookie” (She got thee to a nunnery. To escape all the evil) & the rev’s ex-wife, now married to Andy Belllefleur (New King of Louisiana and Super Vamp), and the lovely long locked Viking Vampire, along with Fae Vampire Hunter, Father of 15 werepanther kittens, Jason Stack-Fullhouse who wacks him in the “Vampire Jewels” with an ultra violet Light Saber…reducing both to naught but goo! Sookie & Eric run off with Pam & Tara & Lafayette (who was married to Sam by Tara’s mother, the new pastor of Bon Temps first Vampire Church “Our Lady of Lillith, in the first legal same sex human/shifter marriage) to raise Tara’s shifter/vamp/witch/fae baby of unknown father in peace & harmony & they al live happily ever after. Merlotte’s is now Arleen’s Diner, Terry is top chef & fire monster. No cooking fuel needed.

  16. Imagine that they drop Sookie being involved in Jason’s quest to find who murdered their parents, only showing her finishing a conversation w/ Claude and the Claudettes. When Bill shows up at her house, lustfully high on lilith juice and killing humans, Sookie lets him in no questions asked. She tells Bill, “you are my first true love.” and kisses him. He whisks her away to her big girl gran bed. They start making their nasty version of love and while I’m screaming at my television and swearing to never watch again–Sookie stuns him w/ her microwave fingers and while Bill is laid out on the floor, she grabs the stake from under her pillow and with that evil fairy giggle she gave when she poured talbot down the drain, Sookie looks him in the eye and says, “but then again, maybe I’m an even better liar and killer than you.” and she stakes him. and after she killed Debbie Pelt the way she did for killing Tara, Sookster has the dark side to do it.

    She calls Eric and when he answers she starts sobbing and can’t talk. the season ends w/ him running out of Fangtasia, taking flight to Sookie’s house.

  17. ‘Eric Northman, but to you the true death’ – pls, pls, pls writers let this be the best foreshadowing on TB … I want him to die by Viking’s hand only

  18. I think Bill killed Sookie parents & informed Sophie Ann sometime ago about the fairy blood on the band-aid. So Sophie Ann had Bill investigate into who’s blood it belonged to. Hence, Bill goes back home & has Sookie’s family tree.

  19. Kill Bill: Version 1
    Bill goes to get his hair cut, in a fit of rage his hairdresser says “……Oh my goddess, you can’t be allowed to walk the earth any more with this disgusting hair and sideburns…………” Bill is promptly staked by his long suffering hairdresser.

    Kill Bill: Version 2
    Godric (Obi wan Kenobi Ghost 1) and Adele Stackhouse (Obi wan Kenobi Ghost 2) team up and decide that enough is enough and from “the other side” kill Bill so Eric can have a chance with Sookie. Godric and Adele also kill off Tara, just for fun and because they are sick of all the lip quivering shit.

  20. Act one scene one: Sookie lies in bed waiting for Bill to show up to her house because she knows he will come due to her fairy blood that he wants. As Bill floats into the room and grabs Sookie to drain her of her precious blood Eric, the Viking vampire, surprises him from a hidden area in the room & stakes Bill.

    Sookie tells Eric I have always waited you.

  21. How about season three when Bill went to Sophia Ann’s sun room and Hadley pushes him in the pool and it’s filled with liquid silver. Beehl soup!

  22. How about we fix Beehl-problem before it even starts: at the very beginning when The Ratts were “draining Beehl” – Sookie never shows up and they really silver him and actually drain him! Problem gone!

  23. Die Bill die!
    Thinking he is going to seduce sookie back to him, bill prepares a candlelit dinner for her. In the process of lighting the candles he drops the match down his shirt setting himself slight. The flames are accelerated by his overly hairy chest. Sookie turns up to his house, sniffs the air before going in. “mmm, barbecue ribs – yum!”

    Russell decides to take bill as his new lover, suddenly enamoured by his mutual love of sideburns. A fate worse than death methinks.

    Maxine Fortenbury inadvertently pursues Bill whilst under the manaeds influence. She binds bill with silver chain and shows him some true southern hospitality. When she leaves him and he manages to get free, he’s so appalled that he commits vamp suicide. Death by walking into the sun dressed in MF’s housecoat.

    I’ve so many more I could probably write a book!

    • Hahhahahahahhahahahahhah! :D Moar please! xD

    • Now this is my idea of a Bill Kill! Way to go, every one of these is PERFECT! Too funny, especially Maxine torture. Maybe she made him watch home shopping network w/ her too. Yes!

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